Let's try this
by Phosphenephonetics
Summary: JohnDave, Hammertime,Pepsicola,DaveJohn,Knight Of Breath, and all the other ship names for Dave and You'll just have to read I suck at Hit me up on my Tumblr, The rating might change over Possible Oh and hints of DadxBro, and RosexKanaya, and -Phosey
1. Chapter 1

You hear the mail slot shut close, and the sound of soft feet tapping down the stairs of your front porch. You bolt down stairs to see if your wig came in.

You open the front door and step outside. You try to hold in how excited you are, but fail by opening the mail slot and screaming with joy when you see your wig has come in.

"HOLY SHIT! IT /ACTUALLY/ CAME!"

A few of your neighbors see you squealing with delight, as you run into your house and rip the package open. Once you finally tear through the built-in bubble wrap, it reveals your new blond wig. ((Not /blonde/ in this case it is for a guy. Deal with it.)) You quickly run upstairs and go to the bathroom. Since you are so excited, you almost pee your pants. Wouldn't want that to happen, laundry takes too long. Plus, these aren't even your pants. Dave would get pissed ((Heheh…pissed…)) if he found out you peed in his pants for getting excited over a wig.

When you are done going to the bathroom you go back down stairs to try on your wig.

Once you finally get it on after fitting your hair into a cap, you put on some sunglasses.

You now look like Dave Strider. How. Fucking. Awesome. This is the only reason why you bought the wig, so you can look like Dave in one week.

You see, Dave got himself into a bit of trouble. He got drunk one night and got a girlfriend. He found this out because one, she texted him with a bunch of hearts and calling him a hot boyfriend, and two, that girl is your sister. Jade Harley. She's liked him for quite sometime now, and he wants to let her down in a nice way. Knowing Dave though, he's not all up and about that life. So, you came up with an idea. YOU can dress up as Dave and let her down the right way.

You decide to take the wig off and Dave's clothes off and put them away for the time being.

You then go into your Dave's room, he's still asleep. Even though it's like-you check the clock-4:13. But then again he did have to work almost all last night until 11:00 this morning.

You gently walk over to his side of the bed and kneel down so you are facing his face. He doesn't have his shades on though. He's gotten used to not sleeping with them and walking around the house with you around.

You pap his face, he doesn't move. You lay your face next to his and breathe deeply and loudly. He still doesn't react. You start to make "mooing" noises. He still won't wake up. You decide to take this a little bit further.

You go around to your side of the bed and go under the covers, and wrap your arms around him. You are almost as cold as death, while Dave is like a body heater. You start to blow into his ear, and whisper, "Nic Cage is awesome, and I know you would go homo for him Dave." At that point he slowly turns toward you and says, "For fucks sake John, is this really how you have to wake me up all the time? You could just make some food and the aroma would wake me up."

"I know, but that isn't as fun as this."

"You find this fun? John, bro, you need to find a new source of entertainment if you find this to be fun."

"Eh, nope. I'm good."

He gives you a tired look, "Why are you always so freaking cold all the time? You're like the-screw it-I don't even have a good metaphor for this." He wraps his warm, lanky arms around you.

You lay your head onto his chest, you always liked listening to his heart beat.

You two do this a LOT. You're not dating though. As much as you wish you were, it would never happen. As far as you know Dave might be Pansexual, but why would he be attracted you of all people?

Even if he did you would never come out. It's not that you're ashamed to be a Homosexual or anything…you just don't know how your dad would take it. He might fully support you, or he may not. You can never really tell with that guy.

You look up to Dave, should you tell him? He is your best bro after all. You know he won't judge you, he's not that kind of guy.

Fuck it, "Hey Dave…?"

"Yeah, what's up?"

"I'm a Homosexual."

He looks at you, he still has his cool kid face on.

"Oh, um, do you like anyone then?"

"Well, yeah…? I guess so."

"You guess so."

"Yeah."

"So you're not sure if you like him or not?"

"Well, I'm sure that I like him. I just don't know how my dad will take it."

"You being a homosexual?"

"Yeah."

"Dude, of all people to tell you should be least afraid to tell your dad."

"Why?"

"He's been fucking my brother man. I thought you knew this man. Get with the program."

"_What?!_"

"Yeah…"

"Way to sugar coat it. I guess it doesn't matter all that much though. At least he isn't allowed to pull that whole 'dishonor to the family' thing."

"So you're gonna tell him?"

"Yeah, I think that would be that smart thing to do…"

"So, who's this guy you like then?" He waggles his eyebrows at you.

You unconsciously lick your lips.

"He's that hot huh? Man, I got some competition then."

Your face turns a light pink, "Right."

"Dude, I was joking, but really who is it you like? You should be able to tell me this."

"Umm, well. I kind of can't tell you yet."

"Why not?"

"I just…well, I can't."

"John, I swear to fucking God if you don't tell me I will piss in your pancakes."

Should you tell him? What if he doesn't like you? What if he just wants to be friends?

But worse, what if he doesn't say /anything/ at all?

Fuck.

"I'll give you his first name."

"I'm fine with that."

"Dave."

"Do you know how many Dave's there are? Also, how do you expect me not to think it's me that you like?"

"I don't expect you not to think that. But really Dave, it's pretty obvious who I like."

He blushes, and sighs, "John, if it's me you like then…"

"Yeah, I know. You don't like me back, that's fine. I'm good."

You look down at his chest and grip to his back a little tighter.

"No, John, I just don't want to hurt you. You know how most of my relationships end… They don't go well."

"Yeah, I know…It's not like I can just stop liking you though. That's not exactly how it works."

"Hey, don't get me wrong. I like you too but, I want you to be with someone better than me. It shouldn't be hard for you to find someone. You're cute, smart, funny, and hey, you can cook."

You look up to him, "Then why can't we at least try? Just for a week? Maybe even two? For me Dave?"

He smiles, "Sure, why not." He leans in and kisses your nose.

His phone starts to go off, it's Jade. Fuck. Fuck, no. No. No. Not now. Please no. Shit. You forgot all about her.

He answers, "Yo, Jade. What's up?

"Yeah?

"Sure,

"No, it's fine. You and Karkat have fun.

"Haha, yeah. Seeya, bye."

He presses the 'End Call button and puts it on the stand.

"Guess who just got dumped for Karkat?"

"Is that a good thing?"

"Hell yeah. That means this whole me and you thing can be official then."

"Yeah?"

"Yup,I should probably get up though. I've been asleep for a while. Want to do something today?"

"Sure."

**Woah, I'm back? What is this? A new fanfiction? This is madness. Anyways, thanks for reading this. I might actually update this regularly. Most likely on weekends. That is if I have no homework.**

**-Phosey**


	2. Chapter 2

**I need to get to the plot of this story soon-wish me luck lovelies~!**

**I DON'T OWN HOMESTUCK! THE CHARACTERS BELONG TO ANDREW HUSSIE**

Your name is Dave Strider, and John Egbert just made breakfast for the first time.

Well, it's not like he hasn't ever made breakfast before. It's just that he doesn't do it that much is all. When he does though, it's pretty damn good. So fucking good, that you always put it into the fridge/freezer for the next day.

"Hey Dave? We still doing something today?"

You look up from your phone to John, "Uhm yeah 'bout that. Karkat said that something popped up and he needs to talk to me or some shit. That's okay right? I mean we can go do something later if you want? I just don't know how long I'll be at his house."

John smiles and looks over to you from putting things away, "That's fine. I can just pick you up or something. Think you'll be done in like an hour or something?"

You look at your phone and re-read the text Karkat sent you.

_Ass-butt (Karkat)- HEY_

_Ass-butt- I NEED TO TELL YOU SOMETHING_

_You- go ahead_

_You- youre on your phone right_

_Ass-butt- YEAH WHAT ELSE WOULD I BE FUCKING TEXTING YOU WITH BUTT FUCK_

_You- then just tell me _

_Ass-butt- DUDE JUST GET YOUR MR COOL KID ASS OVER HERE_

_Ass-butt- SOMETHING POOPED UP_

_You- what the fuck karkat_

_You- don't tell me youre getting into pranks like john_

_You- ive got one john_

_You- I certainly don't need two_

_Ass-butt- IT WAS A FUCKING TYPO SMART ASS_

_Ass-butt- JUST GET OVER TO MY HOUSE_

_Ass-butt- IT WONT TAKE LONG_

_You- fine_

_You- let me tell john_

After quickly skimming through to the last text message, you look back up to John, "Yeah, he said it won't take too long. We can probably go somewhere after wards if you want."

"Mkay. Go ahead and go to his house then, I want to go as soon as possible. I want to go eat some Chinese food."

"Dang John, you know me all too well. So well that it should be illegal. Man-you could like-frame me for /so/ many murders and crimes. You would put smuppets all over the place, and apple juice in the corner of every scene. Oh God but please don't-"

"Dave, for the love of God just go already."

You smile and walk over to John, putting your hands on his waist.

"Sure thing babe."

He smiles and you place a soft kiss on his forehead.

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-TIME SKIPPPPPP/CHARACTER CHANGE WOAH GETTING' CRAY CRAY-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Your name is John Egbert, and it's time for you to go pick Dave up!

You really hope you will get farther than a simple nose or forehead kiss after the date with him. You feel like he's waiting or something. Normally, with anyother girlfriend or boyfriend he has had they would have already made out. You guess you're gonna have to take some time with him being comfortable with kissing you. Yeah, it sucks but-hey-you're lucky enough to date his hot ass.

You go out into your car and start to drive to Karkat's house.

You wonder why Karkat would ask Dave to go to his house on such short notice. Maybe it was a work thing? No…you're pretty sure Dave works for his Bro. Maybe it was another job offer? From who though? Karkats boss? No. Dave /hates/ Karkats boss. He described him as being a huge dick sucker. Although he's one to talk. Even though he's a virgin. Dave only told you this though. For what everybody else knows, he's a big player who fucks every person he meets.

You drive up to Karkats drive way.

You get out of your blue Buggy, and walk up to his house. The door is locked, but it's a good thing he asked you to watch his dog while he was out a week ago. You have the key, and he never really asked for it back. You just figured that you would keep it. Just in case. And in this case, you're sure glad you kept it.

You reach toward the door and unlock it with the red cancer awareness key. Apparently Karkat is a HUGE cancer awareness freak. He donates most of his extra money to the cause of finding a cure for it. His mother had cancer. She died when he was like, twelve or thirteen. You can't really remember.

You open the door and walk in as quietly as you can. Who knows, maybe you can sneak up on the and scare 'em. Heheh, not your best prank to pull, but it'll have to do.

You hear some noise upstairs, you can hear Dave's deep voice, and Karkats raspy growl from the first floor of the house. You start to walk upstairs.

What are they doing? You really want to know. So you decide to peek into karkats room.

You creek open the door.

You wish you hadn't come here. Why would he do this?

Right as you peeked in, you see Karkat lean over to Dave and kiss him. The worst part is, that Dave didn't stop him. You then walk into the room. Eyes glazed over from hurt and disgust from what they both did.

"Sorry to interrupt," You look at Dave, hurt and sadness both apparent in your voice. "Dave, I think you can get a ride home from Karkat. I'll be at Rose's house tonight. Here's some money for the food tonight. You and Karkat can get what you want with the money."

You hand the money to Dave, and begin to walk. Dave tries to grab your shoulder, but you just shake him off. You slam the door shut and run out of the house. You can hear Dave running down the stairs and out of the house to chase after you.

You turn on the car and drive out of his drive way. Dave yelling your name, tears roll down your face. You can feel your eyes begin to swell. Your face begins to heat up. This has never happened to you before. Not in all of your history in dating. You thought that this sort of thing only happened in one of your movies.

You cannot express how wrong you were.

You drive to Roses house. She's a good friend. She'll know what to do. You just know it.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-. -.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-TIME SKIP-.-..-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.- .-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"So that is why you are here I assume?"

"Yeah, it's not like Jade or anyone else can help that much. Sure they can pap me on the shoulder or something but, nothing good that will help me will come out of it."

"Well, John, I am glad you came to me for advice. Have you ever thought that maybe Dave didn't want to be kissed by Karkat? Hm?"

"Well, I thought of that but then I remembered that Dave didn't pull away. I also started to think that maybe Dave likes Karkat back…?"

"This may be true. Are there any other signs that show if he may like him? Does he go to his house often?"

"Well, he does go there a lot. I mean, I did ask him what he does at Karkat's house anyways, and all he said was, 'We do what bros do man. Don't worry 'bout it.' It always did piss me off. Not like I could do anything about it though."

Rose sat in her chair and pet her cat softly. She looks over to her phone which has been off the hook for the past few minutes.

"That would be Dave trying to get ahold of me. Did you tell him where you were going?"

"sadly, yes, stupid I know."

"No, no. Not stupid. Irrational, yes. Excuse me while I answer his questions please. Here, take my cat while I do this. Please, do be careful with Jaspers. He is very old."

You take the cat and watch as Rose sways her way out of the front room.

You pet the cat's soft coat of fur. Since he was so well taken care of, his fur is soft and pretty. The only thing weird about the cat is it's third eye. It really seems like it should be from a town like Night Vale.

Rose walks back into the room. She takes Jaspers off of your lap and puts him in front of his bowl of food and water.

"So, what did Dave want?"

"He wants you to go home to your house so you both can talk."

You frown, "The last person I want to see is Dave right now."

"Yes, I figured that. I told him that you will be staying at my house for the time being."

"Really?! Thanks Rose."

"No problem, but do understand that I have work very early tomorrow. I expect you gone by the time I get home. Which will be, 11:00 o' clock. I get half my work day off ."

"Okay. Thanks again Rose. You really are the best friend I could ever have."

"I guess today has proved so. I'll make you some food. We can watch a movie if you want to."

"Okay! Can I pick the movie then?"

"Yes, you may. Just, for the love of God, don't pick Con Air."

"Don't worry, I'm getting kind of bored of that movie. It's still good though."

"Whatever you say, dork."

"Heheh!"

**And so the story begins! I have SO MANY PLANS FOR THIS YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW!**

**I was thinking, "Hey! How can I make both of these characters suffer the most?"**

**An IDeaS! SO Many OF ThEM!**

**-Phosey**


	3. Chapter 3

**Oh hiya. Here we gooooo**

**I DO NOT OWN HOMESTUCK**

Your name is Dave Strider, and you are freaking the FUCK out.

You have a very GOOD reason to be pacing madly around your apartment.

First of all, John. Need I say more?

Second of all, Karkat likes you.

And third of all, he wants to have sex with you and he's in your apartment, and you may or may not want to do it with him too.

Damn you're a hot mess. Why can't you just pick one. Karkat. Or John. It should be simple! Of course for you it has to be all complex and shit. You can't have a relationship with it being easy.

You decide to try and calm down by sitting on the couch. Karkat walks over to sit next to you.

"So, are you and John…dating…?"

"Yeah, as of yesterday night…"

"Shit. I messed up. I'm sorry. I just thought that maybe you and I could-"

You wave your hand, as if to dismiss his sentence he never finished.

"It's fine. Really. It's just, things are really confusing right now."

"Yeah, I understand. So you _like_ John? I thought you two were just bros."

"We all knew that it was more than that. Bros don't sleep with each-other, or cuddle while watching rom coms. I thought that it was kind of obvious for your guys."

"Well, I guess so…I was probably just hoping that you didn't really-never mind. Anyways, what are you going to do?"

You wish you could answer him. You _would_ answer him. The thing is, you don't even know what you are going to do.

Might as well try and do something, you sure don't want John to think badly of you. You love him. As much as you don't like to admit to things like that, you really do.

The thing is, you are also attracted to Karkat.

Gah, fuck it. Karkat can find someone else. He can find someone better, you know this. You might as well put your all into John.

"I'm going to Rose's house to talk to John."

"Do you need a ride?"

"yeah, thanks. Just don't go inside with me, I should do this on my own."

"Fair enough."

-_TIME SKIPPPPP_-

Your name is John Egbert, and you are walking across the street.

Why would he do that to you? Why would _Karkat_ do that to you? You thought he was a good guy at heart. Same for Dave. Well, Dave did warn you, it kind of is your fault. You got yourself into this didn't you? You insisted you two try going out.

You can see where that got you. You guess you thought that maybe, just maybe, you two would last a year. Guess that's not happening any time soon.

The big question though is, should you break up with him? Well, maybe. The truth is you still really like him. You like the guy who took part in breaking you and on top of that he kissed your best friend. He would always tease about having sex with a bunch of people. As much as you laughed, you were really mad. You wanted to be the first person to share his first time with. Not that he ever really went through with what he said he was going to do anyways. You guess it was just the mere thought of him with someone else sickened you. Especially with Karkat.

Well, it wasn't that bad right? Him kissing Karkat? It was one time right? Won't happen again?

What if it does though. What if he goes off with Karkat behind your back?

Before you can think about more possibilities, you hear Dave screaming your name as you get hit by a car.

**I am soooo not sorry for that ending. I will get to working on the next chpter now though. *wink wonk***


End file.
